Trattoria Pulcinella

LOCATION: C/Regueros, 7-28004 Madrid, Spain (I'm crashing Europe, yeah, baby, yeah!)
TYPE OF FOOD: Italian (yep, that's right: in Spain)
REVIEW: The fusion food movement, if you can call it that (seems the word, "movement", can be applied to anything nowadays.... health food movement, green movement, Civil Rights Movement.. well the last one's fine), is not something that has gained an extreme interest (for me at least, and I'm big in the food blogger world... inside my unconscious mind). But what has gained interest is placing restaurants in random countries from countries thousands of miles away. Now, you may be looking at your piece of glass on top of some metal wondering, why the heck is some random guy talking about displaced restaurants? The answer is because this review that you are currently looking over using several organs in your body consists of one. And if you didn't skip over the part you would have noticed this was an Italian restaurant (unless of course you're a psychic... then tell me when was I born, where was I born, give me three candidates for the Republicans in 2012, what is the name of the next film which will win "Best Picture" and who will game seven between Oklahoma City and Seattle... what?). And no, this is not the North End. This is Iberia. Er, Spain. Sorry.

Going to Spain can be a difficult, yet fun experience, yet when you go into a restaurant, only possessing ('cause you can hold words now!) basic Spanish, it can be kind of hard to read any part of the menu. Thanks to some early classes, however, I was able to figure a few words (and the meaning of life), which was enough to determine what to pick in order to satisfy my various internal acids. Since the menu consisted of a good section of pastas, I decided to consume one of those. Realizing that I didn't my trusty phrase book at my side (or more correctly, my pocket or more correctly, my lap, or more correctly, somewhere near me... in a ten mile radius), I decided to go with one I knew based on its name. I could only read one, so I decided upon it. After some time later, my dish of (what could it be? Marinara, primavera, penne all'arrabbiata? What is it?) puttanesca arrived on my table, reasonably warmed and ready to eat.

The first thing I noticed about the dish was that it was salty. It was salty quite a bit. That did not deter me anyway, and I continued eating the dish. It had some flavor, and the pasta was cooked very well. The ratio between sauce and pasta was adequate, and that the dish wasn't too dry or drowning in sauce. The ingredients in the sauce also didn't overpower one another. I was able to eat it all (with the help of the most abundant compound on Earth's surface) successfully, and then walk onto an over 1,200 year old city.

SERVICE: For being in a country in which the residents spoke a language which you only knew a few lists of and about five minutes looking through a phrase book, the service wasn't half-bad. They (I hope) understood I was an American, and were patient with me. When told I needed more time to think, they left and instead of coming back twenty minutes later like in a certain country I know (hint, hint), they came back in time and served there. If only I knew how to speak Spanish. If only I know how to speak Spanish. That's right. Two tenses.

ATMOSPHERE: The restaurant had authentic Italian atmosphere (and you thought you could only find it in the North End, didn't you?). The outside looked as if you had stepped into Naples (darn wormholes). Inside as you stepped in there was a place where you could drink Sangria (until two in this country... let's just say that make sure you close your windows at night... especially after a football game... no not that football). The floors were clean, and there were candles in quite a few places. The room was somewhat lighted, which added an even more authentic Italian vibe to the place. If only there was an Authentic Italian Restaurant Society. All we have is GEO, GOP, and NBA. Who could watch continuous scoring for forty-eight minutes straight?

PRICE: The price of my dish was nine and a half euros. It was a decent amount of food, not too much yet too little. It did feel almost as if the pan making the dish bumped into the salt shaker and continued stirring and stirring and stirring... but with a glass of water you could get over it. Plus the dish did taste fresh, so overall, it was a decent price. But not Vincent Price. That guy creeps me out a little. A little.

RATING: Trattoria Pulcinella is an authentic Italian restaurant in one of the oldest cities in the world. The atmosphere is pure Italy, the service great and the price reasonable. While the food was a bit salty, it was only one dish and with a glass of water, you can be able to eat it without your mouth being too salted out. You know, I think Madrid might be starting to grow on me. I just can't handle the coffee. I don't like coffee. Trattoria Pulcinella gets a five out of five.